The day I lost any pride remaining.

I'm tired. I woke up feeling like a truck hit me. Throughout the day my energy level increased and I took my ass to the pool-- cause I love my Monday night swim class.

BUT OH NO.....Tonight we started everyone out of the water-- then we dove in, 2 at a time, completely not warmed up, and snaked 6 lanes-- 300 yards. For the record-- until I've done at least 100 or 200 I swim like a elephant.

A warmup for a beginner is usually 150/200 max (at your own pace and in the beginner lane). Not tonight my friends.

Everyone passed me. EVERYONE. By the time I was done everyone had already cooled down-- and I finished in the SUPER FAST PEOPLE LANE. It was one of the more embarrassing moments I've had recently. One person (one kind person) said-- "way to finish"-- everyone else just looked at me like I was slow.  (I was slow)

I recovered and got back to my lane and started the drills. I was swimming slower than a cat trying not to drown doing my drills and all night basically.

SO THEN THEY CHOSE TONIGHT TO TIME OUR 100. My goal is to be about 2:00/2:10 per 100 for my race in April. Tonight-- 2:37. For the love of all that is holy....such a bad night in the pool. I left feeling pretty defeated.

I swear, it gets worse. So, I had a dinner thing with one of my team members and had to go straight from the pool to pick him up. Putting on real people clothes after a swim is NOT EASY. But I was trying to put on a spandex dress and leggings...while still wet. I GOT STUCK-- AND HAD TO ASK THE FAST SKINNY GIRLS TO UNTANGLE ME. If I had any pride left if my body-- it's all gone, every single ounce of it. What a day....glad it's over.

I'm gonna wear a onesie.....

So, finding the perfect Tri Kit is super hard. Especially when your top is smaller than your bottom-- it can be hard to find a top that stays put over your bum.

For the past few races I've been fidgeting with my top too much cause it sometimes rides up a bit BUT NO LONGER. Today when I was at my favorite gear shop, Podium Multisport, http://podiumms.com/, my buddy Andy recommended I try on the singlet--- NO WAY, I thought.

It's tough for bigger ladies to look good in any tri gear-- BUT A ONSIE? No way jose.

Well-- he kept persisting that I would like it as I wouldn't have anything to fool around with-- so I tried it on. HOLY SHIT YALL-- WHY HAVEN'T I BOUGHT THIS BEFORE? And it's all black...what?? I cannot wait to race in this bad boy-- built in bra, and a size Large. Not XL. Just Large. It has tons of compression so hopefully there's not too much jiggly going on-- we shall see on race day for sure. WOOHOO!

Also, I'm going on my first group ride with ATC on Sunday-- I'm super nervous but there are 4 groups, 20-22 MPH, 17-19 MPH, 15-17 MPH, and below 15 MPH. My last race I rode about 18 on a flat course-- which is the 2ND TO FASTEST GROUP, what??? They say to join the group that is the one above of what you're riding so you can push yourself and fall back if you need....since it's my first ride, I'm going to ride with the 17-19 group and take it from there.

Off to the pool I go....LESS THAN A MONTH. (And I ran 4 times last week/BOOM!)

Couch to 5k....again.

I've been a runner.

I mean, when I was a kid, I could run forever-- and fast. In high school I was running a 6 minute mile on a regular basis. I never had to think about my breathing, my legs, anything-- it was no different than walking down the block.

When I was right out of college I could knock out 3-4 miles at a decent pace, 9/10 minute miles.

When I was 25 or so I ran my first half marathon. That-- was hard. I had ankle surgery 3 days later.

Since that time, running hasn't been easy. I've done a few 10k's, another half, and 4-5 5K's, and 2 sprint tri's-- all of which I've pretty much detested the running portion.

So, I decided to do what other people do-- teach myself how to run again. I looked up the Couch to 5K program and I started. I'm 2 weeks in (run 90 seconds, walk 2 minutes). Tomorrow will be my first run of the next portion- (run 90 seconds, walk 90 seconds, run 3 minutes, walk 3 minutes). No joke, I think it's working.

I have made one concious change-- I'm running without music. In the past I've gotten so caught up about the perfect song playing at the exact moment I needed it that I knew I was crippling myself. I want to enjoy running again. I don't want cords all over the place getting in the way-- me thinking about how the beat to the song isn't working with my stride-- non of the bullshit. Just me, my 2 feet and a bottle of water.

Maybe, when I'm a "runner" again-- I'll get to play with toys and such but now, I just have to focus on one thing. Run for 90 seconds, walk for 90 seconds, run for 3 minutes, walk for 3 minutes-- rinse and repeat.

Going for the podium.

I have my next Tri in one month- April 26th. The past few weeks have been good-- riding the bike, in the pool and trying to run. 2 bricks in the books in the past week. I'm still not running well-- and I'm really not running well after my bike (calf cramps) BUT-- I'm doing it.

Turns out the last tri I did, I trained horribly for. It turns out that just swimming occasionally and going for bike rides does NOT equal race day preparation. If I want to do well/better then I have to do the following:

1. Swim every week-- doing drills and some for distance. Every time I swim I need to be conscious of form and the strength behind my pull. And my kick-- it doesn't need to help me that much but I have to keep my feet/legs level so it doesn't HURT me.
2. Bike like I'm racing. Going for a stroll does me little good other than saddle time, which is important but more important will be really pushing myself on the bike.
3. Running. Yes, it turns out that I can't just swim and bike and think that I'll be able to run. That is unfortunately NOT how it works. (although I had absolutely convinced myself of that).
4. Doing brick workouts. THIS is NOT optional (I had also convinced myself it was) if I want to be able to finish strong-- even if it's just a sprint. Working 2 disciplines back to back isn't easy. It's even harder on race day with everything else going on.

I've set a pretty lofty goal for this race. I want to podium for the Athena category and I'm shooting for a time of 1:38-- with all things being equal to last year that would put me in good shape-- but you never know who will be there. It also looks like the bike times were pretty slow last year-- must slower on average than my Naples race. I also, however, know that I'm going to kick my swim time in high gear-- hoping to get out of the water in 14 minutes.

But all in all--I'm hoping for a fun race and experience.