There's always tomorrow

Monday was a tough day for me as expressed regarding my ski pant situation. I was so down on myself that I was concerned it was going to start a downward spiral into the gloomy depths of cheese and inactivity. HELL NO! I woke Tuesday ready to go-- I can't let stupid ski pants ruin my progress. Ruin my forward momentum. As I sit in the Atlanta airport I can look back on yesterday and be proud. I worked out with my trainer, had some acupuncture work done and feel GREAT. I've got big workout plans for tomorrow, Friday and Saturday-- 2 of which will involve SKI's and some nice hiking. While I'm on the road the food can always get a bit iffy but I'm committed to being smart this trip. Next week I head to LA to get trained for my Poster Child responsibility and I believe it's going to involve some SERIOUS fitness tests...I'm actually a little excited, along with a lot of nervous. Ok...here's hoping to get out of ATL before the storm hit.

stupid stupid ski pants

my ski pants are too small. i mean, they will pull on but they are super tight. and considering we have a snow event this weekend I figured i would buy some new ones in 1 size larger...even if they will be too big in no time (fingers crossed). they arrived today. and were equally tight. i cried.
what an emotional journey this whole thing is. i refuse to be uncomfortable for 2 days on the slopes so i ordered the next size up. i cried again. but that's all ok i imagine-- i'll have good days and bad days on this journey. to keep my motivation high i'm reminded of my skinnier days. here's a picture of me posing with my favorite celebrity ever about 30 pounds ago.

Oh so confused.

Last week at this time I weighed 214 lbs. This week, 210. I have absolutely no idea why I lost 4 lbs in a week. Here's what I did:
Sunday: Light workout, lots of drinking for Falcons game, ate relatively well, walked everywhere I went, drank lots of water.
Monday: Walked to find my car from the day before (my workout), veged out on couch with Netflix remainder of day, lots of water, decent food, no booze.
Tuesday: Flew to Tampa, lots of water, walked/ran for 30 minutes, ate at BERNS--- Fish, mashed potatoes, cheese plate, french onion soup, 1 martini, 2 glasses of wine, bite or 3 of dessert.
Wednesday: Ate way too much healthy food-- DM meeting. Sat around a table all day in meetings with hummus and what not just begging me to eat it. No workout other than a crazy ass run through the airport to make my plane. Had dinner at 11:30 PM in hotel, no booze.
Thursday: AM workout, decent food throughout day, light dinner, event Thursday night-- on feet until midnight working, few drinks afterwards, in bed by 1:30-- no late night food.
Friday: Fly back to ATL, pretty good food day, intense workout with trainer with 30 minutes additional cardio, no booze, good nights sleep.
Saturday: Intense hike, household chores, some heavy lifting in terms of furniture, lots of veggies for dinner, no booze, good nights sleep.
Sunday: 210 lbs.
The consistents this week were: I MOVED every day...whether it was intense workouts or not. I drank a shit ton of water every day. I limited my booze (except Sunday), I didn't eat late night (except for dinner on Wednesday and it was all protein).
Just looking at my weight chart to the right you can see an up and down, up and down type of thing going on...wonder what it would be like to just LOSE weight rather than go on this crazy roller coaster.

Food and PT

I have the most amazing Personal Trainer-- Brandy at Exhale Spa. She kicks my ass so freaking hard that I have not worked out with her yet where I wasn't questioning if death was imminent. She also helps me really focus which is huge for me. Here's a picture of her doing something I'll be doing in no time...

Also my friend Kacey was telling me about her new diet regimen that involves what seems to be some super smart choices. Big breakfast packed with protein, healthy snack, relatively large lunch, healthy snack and then no carbs after 3:00 PM, with dinner being the smallest meal of the day. Her trainer also told her that cardio is much more effective in the morning opposed to the evening and that she only needs 3 sessions of 20 minute cardio per week (heart rate over 140 entire time) and then 3 sessions of strength training each week-- and no more than 7 drinks a week. She's looking and feeling great so there maybe something to her plan. I think I'm just going to have to figure out what works best for my body and also understand that what works may change as my body and routines change as well. That's what I got for now. I hope everyone has a great weekend. I'm going to keep pretty chill and get some stuff done around the place and start PACKING for my upcoming move across town. House with a yard here I come!

Encouragement, Traveling and Sleep

I can't believe it's been more than a few days since I've written. I've been traveling this week for work and can't seem to quite get in a rhythm...but the good thing is that I've made working out a priority this week when I was on the road a snagged a workout in both Tampa and Charlotte and an impromptu workout in the ATL airport when I OJ'ed through that bitch to make a flight. Seriously...my cardio ability was severely challenged. When I finally got on the plan the dude sitting next to me turned on the air for me and got me some water :)
Last night I got to hang out with Stephanie Craig who was the SEBU Poster Child last year and she was so motivational about my upcoming journey. She let me know a little bit about my upcoming trip to California-- it's apparently going to be challenging to say the least. BUT...I know I can do just about anything I put my mind to.
Today I'm going to fly home and head straight to the acupuncturist...still keeping this odd dude around for a bit longer and then to a personal training session...talk about a way to start off the weekend. Alright...more to come in the next post about my friend Kacey's eating plan that her trainer put her on.

Lance Armstrong and weight gain

I hate Lance Armstrong. Well, that's too personal. I think Lance Armstrong is a total douche. A few years ago my friend who was an Olympic athlete at the time told me that it was well known in the high performance community that Lance was dirty and every since then I've never believed a word that he said. In fact, I have a lengthy twitter relationship with Lance that if researched is humorous. What I'm wondering right now is who the hell is this man paying to be his publicist? He has the opportunity of a lifetime to come clean and then turn the tables completely onto the sport of cycling-- that is just as dirty as Lance is and make positive changes moving forward for the sport. But I don't see that happening any time soon. A few years ago when I was working for Nissan and they wanted to be the "official car" of Team Radio Shack I begged the manager of this project to put a "doping" clause into the contract. I knew that this is how this whole dealio was going to end because I had inside information but they wouldn't think of it. STUPID STUPID STUPID.

Just wanted to get all of that off my chest.

In other news. I gained a stupid pound this week and ate well, worked out crazy hard and drank a shit ton of water. Not quite sure how this whole thing works but damn-- not the best feeling. BUT...I will not let myself get down. I'm heading to the park for a walk with Ashley prior to the Falcons game so there's that...#RiseUP.

Near Death

This morning I worked out with my awesome personal trainer Brandy at Exhale Spa and I'm not sure how but I'm still alive. As I'm still recovering from surgery I told her that I couldn't lift super heavy weight and that it might be a good idea to focus on cardio and next thing I know I'm running stairs lifting a medicine ball over my head, Jumping from hoop to hoop, doing jacks with weights and jumping lunges. I truly thought I might die. A couple things to note here...the power of positive thinking is one of them. As soon as I get down on myself or tell myself I can't do something I'm finished. I mean done. Near tears. BUT, if I can stay positive-- keep pushing happy thoughts into my brain, I'm golden. A few times this morning I got down on myself but then I just re-focused and started thinking about why I'm on this journey. I'm on this journey for myself. For my health. So I won't fall victim to my family traits of diabetes, sleep apnea, and heart problems. I'm on this journey for my friends (Wells and all of yall), I'm on this journey for my peers to show them that anything can be done if you work hard enough.

To show  you how hard I worked...here's a picture of my red face AFTER a 20 minute cold shower....

Body Fat

My new fancy scale that I've referenced a few times below gives me my weight and my percentage of body fat. For the past few days I've been working out and eating well but my weight isn't going down...but my body fat is. This is the most frustrating thing ever. While I know it's a good thing for people who are trying to tone and get "cut"that's not me. I'm trying to lose lots of fat and weight. How do I drop both body fat percentage and weight? You WOULD think they would come together. ARGH.

I wanted to eat an entire pizza today.

Some days are more difficult than others in terms of the types and amounts of food my body craves. Today...not so great. At some point I truly wanted to eat a pizza. Not a piece but an entire pizza. The good thing? I didn't.
I think this means that I need to do a better job of eating healthy snacks throughout the day to keep me from getting ravenous. I would any suggestions anyone has out there for healthy snacks to keep around.
One thing I did today that I was pretty proud of was to specifically eat my dinner very slowly. I can be a very fast eater but I know that eating slowly will help me get and stay full. I also went to a super difficult class today at the gym but sweating felt good. That's it for today.

Good Mood Food?

So now that I'm the Poster Child I've been making consistently better food choices around my peers which is certainly a good thing. However, yesterday was an atrocious food day. I woke up in Boone with my Carolina team and had the Healthy Start breakfast...alright...nice move. The rest of the day...bad. I even stopped at Arby's. I was hungry and needed something to give me a boost of energy for the car ride that was dragging. I had already had a super big tea and a Red Bull and didn't want to drink any more caffeine for the day so I thought curly fries would be a good boost. Ridiculous.

Today was MUCH MUCH better on the food and the working out. I made my first trip to the gym since my surgery about 10 days ago. I went to a Barre Class and then did an extra 15 minutes of cardio. Class was brutal as I'm still SUPER sore from my skiing endeavor on Saturday but it was great to get back on track at the gym.

The Longest Best Day Ever

A couple of things to think about tonight as I write.

First...the best part. Today was awesome. Yesterday was equally awesome. I've been doing some thinking and last night at Red Bull Thre3Style may have been one of the best executed events I've ever been a part of from top to bottom. The production, the promotion, the on-site execution...all of it...stellar. I was so proud of my team, my peers, and my counterparts that I couldn't sleep last night. But turned out I had to get up at the ass crack of dawn to drive 5.5 hours to Boone, NC.

I've been excited about this trip for a couple of reasons but mostly because I was going to get to spend some time with a new team member of mine and sadly say goodbye to another. However, getting up at 6AM and making an insane drive after the preformentioned event turned out to be a bit ruff. As soon I got in the car I wanted to turn around. Make up some excuse, ANYTHING. But I drove on, listening and singing to whatever I could find and made it to the mountains.

Turned out it was so great to be here. I was able to be surrounded by so many awesome people with great passion but that's just the tip of the iceberg. We went skiing. In 65 degree weather. I may have worn my Lululemon yoga pants because my ski pants dont currently fit (so well).

Of course I started off on the bunny slope (duh)...I have only skied 3 times prior and 2 of them didn't count because I still had all the metal in my ankle and I was in more pain than a normal human is ever in during their entire life. The last time involved skiing in Tennessee, which turns out is similar to skiing in North Carolina...I digress. I killed the bunny slope. Did it twice and nailed that shit.

Next off, the green slope. My first time down ended, well, in a bit of a spill. Thanks to a courageous SBM (Connor) I was able to make it down to ski again. I ended up owning that green. I even taught a couple of first timers as well. After my green mastery I thought it would be time to turn in..we only had 20 minutes left of skiing and my legs were spent. But, oh no...next thing I know, I'm on a lift heading up to the top. Black on the left. Blue on the right. I, of course, chose the Blue. My main man Joe from COC stayed with me the entire way. I may have fallen 12 times. I may have had to take my skis off every one of those times. I might have fallen once in a mud pit. It may have taken me 30 minutes to get down the hill.

BUT... I did it. I actually skied the last half of the hill nicely. There's no doubt in my mind that I'm going to be sore in places tomorrow I didn't know existed. My abs will for sure be tired from laughing so much. But all in all, today was a great day. We even ended the evening with a nice dinner and some dance floor action.

Lastly, and un related to everything above...

I'm a little pissed about my fluctuation of weight. The first few days of the week I was losing weight every time I got on the scale. A couple of ounces here and there. But for the past 3 days, every time I've gotten on the scale I've gained weight (a couple of ounces each time). Every one of those days I've come below my total calorie count for losing weight. I'm wondering if I shouldn't weigh myself every day. Am I making myself crazy?

Oh, and BTW...it pays to sit by a D1 ACC football player at dinner. I fed him half of my rack of lamb and mashed potatoes and actually ate a few delicious bites of both without going overboard.

Posters and what not

So at Red Bull we have this internal program called Fit For Flight that helps employees get fit, stay fit and meet their fitness goals...I've mentioned it in a few previous posts. As part of Fit For Flight we have a program called "Poster Child" and basically each Business Unit picks one person to motivate employees and achieve their goals. I applied this year but usually they pick people that are already super fit and didn't think I would get chosen...BUT I DID! I'm now the official poster child for the SOUTHEAST....holy shit.
While I'm very excited, I'm also super nervous. Can the fat girl motivate all the skinny people? Can the fat girl get fit? Now, all eyes are on me. But the best part? Red Bull is going to help ME meet my fitness goals as well.
I knew that 2013 was going to be a special year already, but now...just wait.

East vs. West

Today I visited Dr. He, an acupuncturist recommended by my good friend Veronica for some neck and should pain that has been hurting me super bad during workouts but also bothering me throughout the day as well. The appointment started with some questioning along the lines of why I took allergy medicine (duh, for allergies) and why I tool birth control (duh, to control my periods). Then he went into some serious Acu Pressure and let me tell you this man knew where to put his thumb to really hit the painful areas. I was impressed....and in pain. During the acu pressure he made some comments about me needing to lose weight...I told him I was fully aware and that I was working with it. Case closed.

Then Dr. He...the man below puts me on the table and starts putting needles all over me. Some I didn't feel at all and some hurt like hell. I could internally feel the energy in my body rushing to the needles-- it was awesome and a little weird all at the same time.

Dr. He went on to talk about example how bad I needed to lose weight and that acupuncture wouldn't work without me losing weight. He told me to only eat half of all of my food and that I needed to take 24 herbal pills a day but that I should only lose .5 lbs a week or max 1 lbs per week so my skin doesn't get "wrinkly".

By the end of the hour I felt relaxed but preached to as well. He says I should go off both the Zyrtec and MonoNessa and to be clear, once again, must lose weight. He also told me I needed to lower my cholesterol. Then I gave the good ole Dr. a piece of my mind...I have AMAZING cholesterol and have never had any type of health issues from my weight. I'm the healthiest overweight person out there. I'm fully aware I need to lose weight but didn't feel the need to tell him about my blog, my goals, etc, etc.

The decision is to go back to Dr. He or to stay the course. I do feel better and like the thought of acu pressure and acupuncture but have no interest in getting a lecture every session. Classic thought of East vs West...

Ode to Chorizo Breakfast Burrito

I'm always going to be the girl that eats the Chorizo Breakfast Burrito when a Mexican walks in my office and tells me her dad made them specially for us. I'm never going to turn that burrito down, ever. And you know what? I'm OK with that. What WOULD be the problem is if I purchased something bad for me every morning. Or every day at lunch or dinner.
The point here is, life is too short to not enjoy the special parts of your day/life that pop up randomly that involve good food. I don't ever want to be that crazy person that say's NO all the time. I do want to be the person that drinks a kale, apple, wheatgrass, lemon and apple juice MOST mornings. I do want to be the person that makes really good food decisions 95% of the time. I do want to be mostly vegetarian. (That burrito was my first meat since Dec 30)
That is all.

U Booze It U Don't Lose It.

So back when I started this blog my goal was to lose 48lbs by May 15th (my birthday). To date, I've lost 9. Ok, so that's something. My goal is absolutely reach-able but it will mean that I'll have to pull a few weeks where I lose more than 2lbs, which will be difficult, considering I'm averaging 1lb per week, BUT...I made it through those 9 weeks of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years and still dropped some weight-- go me. The bottom line is that I'm not going to get discouraged and while I certainly want to hold myself to this goal I'm going to stay positive because any way you cut it, I'm making healthier decisions on the whole which is a win. End the end I want to get my BMI down to 25% or less which for me would be around 164lbs-- another 12 lbs.

On another subject...I haven't had alcohol in 7 days and the sad thing? I can't remember the last time I didn't have at least 1 drink in that amount of time. It had to be the last time I had the flu or had ankle surgery. Wow. But you know the coolest thing? I'm thinking very clearly, feel great and have been in good moods. Also, I haven't been nearly as irritable as I can sometimes be known to get, I mean, according to other people.

My surgery recovery seems to be going OK although I call my doctor pretty much all the time freaking out about something...nothing has yet to be worrisome to them. I think I'll be able to hit the gym by Thursday and am planning on skiing this weekend.

Eating well and enjoying it.

I love pasta, eggs and cheese. My 3 favorite things. And of course in moderation they are all OK. But if I could have pasta every night I would. Until tonight.
Tonight I decided to have "pasta" without the actual, ahem...pasta. I made a vegetable tomato based sauce with 1 squash and 1/2 a zuchinni and rather than put it on top of pasta I just topped it with some parmesean cheese and ate the veggies all by themselves. AND IT WAS AWESOME. Turns out I really like a good sauce with a little yummy cheese on top. If I can just get it down to only the veggies I'll be good.

Fancy scales and what not

When I got home from my visit to Nashville I was surprised to see a box from my homegirl at HQ- Jackie Nith. Jackie runs our company Fit For Flight program-- basically, it's Red Bull's way of saying...get your ass in shape, eat well, be mentally present and you'll be a better person (and of course in the end, a better employee). Many companies are starting programs like this and I'm all for it-- any type of positive encouragement we can get as employees is a good thing in my book. Ok, ok...back to my box.

I opened it to find an amazing new scale that at first look was a really pretty scale. But after doing some research (opening the box and setting it up) it turns out that this scale could possibly cook me dinner or give me a massage. But seriously, it's WI-FI enabled and will link to my Fit Bit account and it tells me my BMI-- not just my weight. HOLY SHIT. I also got a new Fit Bit sent to me to help me achieve my goals in 2013. Thank you Jackie and thank you Red Bull.

Friends and froyo.

Today was the day for replenishments and I was greeted by 2 awesome friends, Ashley and Whitney who brought me vegetables, flowers, toilet paper, magazines and frozen yogurt. But not just ANY frozen yogurt. Apparently Ben & Jerry's makes a half baked Froyo, which I had no idea about. Half baked is my favorite ice cream that can be bought at the grocery store and to know that they make a froyo version is not a good idea.


It's like the day that dad came to Atlanta and wandered around my neighborhood and the next thing I know there's a Waffle House less than a block from my place that I had no idea about. AND I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW ABOUT.

They did, however, get me a Shape Magazine that I'm excited to browse for some new tips.

Cheers to great friends!

Pain Management...at 4AM

So, apparently this pain management situation can be difficult in the middle of the night. Hence, I'm awake right now in a bit of, well, pain. But I took 800 MG of Advil in hopes of being back to sleep within the next 30 minutes or so. BUT....while I was up I just read that the majority of American's consume 21% of their daily calories through sugary drinks. For some reason this is astounding to me.

We all know, per the blog, that I have some weight to lose. But 1 thing I'm not guilty of is getting my calories on a daily basis through sugary drinks. Come on people-- if you're going to over indulge do it on some cheese and pasta and not Coke or Pepsi.

I didn't taste a soda or anything else carbonated until I was at least 10 or older and I remember my reaction to this day...I spit it out. First, I hated the taste and secondly the carbonation hurt my mouth. Our good friend Heineken (high school beer of choice) helped me get over the carbonation issue, and now our good friend Red Bull Sugar Free has continued the maturation of my taste buds when it comes to carbonation but to this day I cannot drink sodas.

Just really couldn't believe that statistic. I would liked to thank my parents for not allowing that crap in our home. I was forced to drink milk, water or juice. Or...on a very special day at Granny's I could have sweet tea (come on, we were from Nashville).

Candles, and baths, and pain killers?

GROSS DETAIL ALERT AHEAD: Woah. This is tough and like an idiot all last night I made it worse for myself. Part of having this specific surgery means that for the next few days my entire digestive region (bladder, colon, stomach, rectum, anus) is going to be all sorts of in fits. I've peed approximately 42 times since I got home yesterday-- and yes, that means that I didn't sleep last night. The reason I keep peeing? Because I can't empty my bladder. The reason I can't empty my bladder? Because my muscles are so tense and are doing weird things. The reason my muscles are tense? I stopped taking the mutherfucking Percoset and/or other pain killer.

You see, I thought it was a sign of bravery that I stopped with the pain killers...turns out, just stupidity. The good news is that when I called the doctor this morning she assured me that I wasn't the only stupid person she had ever met and told me to take the pain killers whether I wanted to or not--so I'll relax. She also suggested a relaxing bath-- not just a sitz bath but to light some candles, play some music, meditate...HELL YES. Forced relaxation-- I've been waiting for this all of my life.

So now I'm back on the pills (Shears would be proud), and back to my new resting spot-- the couch. Going to try to do a tiny amount of work and then zap out for the rest of the day. Wish me luck on not peeing every 15 minutes and may the forced relaxation be all its cracked up to be.

And in health/weight related news...I'm thinking another day of all liquids-- soups, arden's garden smoothies and then tomorrow I'll start with some veggies.

Percoset...not all it's cracked up to be

So as I mentioned earlier I had some surgery earlier today on a digestion issue of sorts and thankfully it went very well. It's certainly keeping me in bed and in some considerable pain. Mostly my pain is focus in the region of the incisions and then also my throat hurts quite bad from when they intubated me.

In the past with my 2 ankle surgeries the Percoset they gave me afterwards really did the trick-- it made me loopy and pain free. But this time it's making me really loopy but the pain isn't going away. Apparently, with any narcotic it works on your brain and not the actual pain. Sounds a little silly to me. Tomorrow I'm going to start using the other pain medication they gave me which is not so heavy on the brain whatever.

But in AMAZING NEWS...when I got home yesterday I had a gift from the awesome folks at Red Bull HQ that had read my post about the Poster Child program and sent me a new fit bit and a super cool techy scale. I feel very lucky to have a supportive company in my goals to get fit.

Ok. The next dose of Percoset is kicking in. Gonna try to sleep again. Or go on a magic carpet ride.

New Year.

Loved the way I rung in the New Year last night....asleep. Was able to wake up early and then head back to Atlanta and I'm so very happy to be back. Although my workouts are put on hold as I'm having a small surgery tomorrow, I should be back on my feet within a week.

Be ready for some pain killer induced posts over the next few days. :)

While in Nashville I was pretty good about working out and also decent on the food. After the surgery I'm kicking this plan back into FULL GEAR. And it starts today-- no alcohol in the month of January. Yup...a whole month. Including 4 Red Bull Thre3Styles, a SBM Kick Off and lots of travel.

I'm not making any health related New Years resolutions because I've already made those plans. What I am resolving to do this year is:

Master a new language (Spanish or French)
See more live music
Save a significant amount of money

Alright, later gators.